yesterday i was mighty late for class.

many many swerves, a pretty silent ahpek & $14 later, i was apologising, as usual, to irda. she is a gem of a PR tutor. i like her. she's funny. but not in a chris tucker funny or a clown funny. she has her charms i guess. and i feel dead paiseh because im increasingly late for her classes CAN. but they are in the morning CAN.

shut up netty. enough of the blaming. honestly, what nadiah asked (and then shared with) me during the break really caught me off guard.

i began thinking about my so-called ego.

'have you considered teaching as a career, netty?'

i swear i wanted to strangle the living daylights of my beautiful (YES rashidah i KNOW) friend. both of us had our opinions. but she gladly allowed me to 'explain' myself first.

i didnt want to be one of those
especially malay girls
who didnt quite make it through Alevels
(at least with impressive results)
to do what i want at a local uni.
and thus end up in NIE.

teaching PRIMARY school.

gosh can you hear that ugly tone i'd undertaken? major condescending. astaghafirrullah. interestingly, our opinions apparently overlapped each other. she had/has been feeling the same way as i did/do.

however, increasingly my thoughts had been about how im very passionate about tutoring. i enjoy the company of my 8, 12, 14, 15, 16, 17 year olds. i actually exchange resources where i can. psle, olevels, nlevels. logarithm, partial fractions, fractions. i hear out my friends' grimaces about their tuition kids. then share my similar experiences. if one were to hear us out, it's easy to mistake them as our own kids.

i simply enjoy teaching.

and it's not all about the monetary returns i so-called reap from all these. i dare say tutoring my mum's friend's ___ <- too many nouns to fill in here, has left me seriously dehydrating for that extra moolah for that topshop top. or aldo bag. or another new pair of sunnies. no, its not about that sorta kaching-kaching return. and please, dont you be too fast to label me as a nerd or a geek. because i didnt judge you

i just happen to value a good education
more than you possibly could imagine

spoke to mardi last tuesday about the malay community in singapore and there are many underpinning nuances about a good education. especially in this community that i am a part of. somewhat. availability & then the lack of. are we really lazy & stupid & good for nothings? alas, the debate is far-reaching. i shall leave that to another day.

and so there it goes. im like almost halfway through to my second-last semester at monash. i still have no nuts about what my future would hold up for me.

but one thing's for sure.

my happy days are here to stay
at least if i choose to make that happen